The Memory of Suzumiya Haruhi
by Flower of Paper
Summary: Haruhi's latest scheme spirals out into an unexpected development in her relationship with Kyon.
1. Koukoku, Advertisement

**Suzumiya Haruhi no Koukoku**  
_The Advertisement of Suzumiya Haruhi_

_Disclaimer_: Many thanks to Tanigawa Nagaru-sensei for providing these wonderful characters! (And his writing style!)

_Notes_: According to the reviews for my previous story "The Attraction of Suzumiya Haruhi", I need to work on my grammar and not place author's notes in the middle of a story. Admittedly I'm not used to writing in present-tense monologue, but hopefully this story flows better. I've also worked harder on the humor aspect, while still trying to keep everybody in character. Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

Another boring day in the erstwhile Literature Club room. Koizumi and I are playing yet another game of Othello (according to Nagato-san, it's our 749th game, and what's more, my current track record is 532 wins, 199 losses, 17 stalemates) and Asahina-san's experimenting with some new flavors of tea. 

_Bang!_

The door scoots open faster than any human could possibly kick it. Hell, if I was that door, I'd automatically run away from that powerful foot too.

"Mikuru-chan! I want to try your new tea, and make it volcano hot, please!"

Why do you care how hot it is? You swallow that stuff with a maximum of five-and-a-half gulps anyway.

"Y-yes, Suzumiya-san."

Our tea goddess Asahina Mikuru immediately goes to work making tea at the whim of our Brigade Chief. I'll admit this is one of Haruhi's few whims that I wholeheartedly encourage. Honestly, with Asahina-san's tea-making skills (I'm not obsessed, merely admiring) she could serve me with nothing more than hot tap water, and I'd drink it down with a smile.

After kicking the poor door shut, Haruhi strides to the long table and dumps a paper bag upon it. Do I even want to know what's in there?

"Kyon! Stop muttering to yourself, we've got business to take care of!"

I swear, for some reason I never get tired of Haruhi bellowing my name like that.

"And that would be?"

Haruhi throws a mildly annoyed look in my direction.

"I'm getting to that. Last week, it occurred to me that we really aren't doing enough to promote the SOS-dan and all that we stand for. Right, Koizumi-kun?"

"Now that you mention it, that sounds about right, Suzumiya-san."

Damn kissup.

"Which is why—"

—Haruhi reaches into the bag—

"—I went to a T-shirt shop and had these printed!"

Haruhi happily pulls five white T-shirts out of the bag, all proudly emblazoned with the full name of the SOS-dan, along with our location and meeting hours.

Wait, we have meeting hours? I just thought we met every single day, or whenever Haruhi gets bored (which is every single day).

And encircling the waist of each T-shirt is a seven-centimeters-tall reproduction of those infamous symbols Haruhi and I drew on the field a little over three years ago: _I AM HERE, COME FIND ME_.

Oh gods, _why_ do I not like where this is going?

"Uh, Haruhi, you _have_ taken into consideration the fact that this school has a uniform, right?"

"Well, of course I have! And anyway, it's not like we're going to be wearing these during school hours."

"Well, that's a relief. At least you're not breaking any rules this time."

Hey, wait a second...why am I relieved? If we're not going to be wearing these during school hours, that simply means we're going to be wearing them..._in public_?!

"Exactly! See, Kyon, you and I are on the same wavelength sometimes!"

Now that's scary.

"My plan is to have us move about the city while wearing these T-shirts. Simple and painless. Of course, since we're all the original members, we can answer all the questions people are going to ask us!"

Yeah, yeah. Questions like _"is that the Suzumiya girl I've heard about"_ to which the only honest answer would be _"yes, and somehow I've found my way into her world"_. Lucky me.

"Lucky you, indeed! This city is like a willow tree, and we're the hummingbirds fluttering around it, flitting from branch to branch, spreading our good cheer!"

We'll be spreading something, all right. Damn, I don't have a sarcastic comment ready. And would you stop with the crazy metaphors?

"What's so crazy about that? Say, are you Buddhist, Kyon?"

"Yes, but I don't see—"

"—So am I! So you'll have no trouble understanding what I'm about to say. You know as well as I do, our religion teaches that all things are interconnected."

Oh, they certainly are. More than you could know.

"And therefore, it's reasonable to assume that anything could become a metaphor for anything else. It's a good artist who can bring out such unforeseen connections."

How'd we get on this topic?

"And these metaphors that we call _'fresh'_ and _'interesting'_ are, in reality, existing metaphors waiting to be found. Fresh and interesting, that's what I'm all about. That's why I actively seek out such things, rather than wait for them to find me. You know what I'm trying to say, Kyon?"

"..." For once, I'm speechless.

"Okay, let's all try on our new outfits! Don't worry, I bought us matching shorts too. Koizumi-kun, take these two outfits and Kyon out into the hall, and try on those clothes. I had to guess at the sizes, but I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Okay, Suzumiya-san."

Koizumi and I step out into the hall, and I have a pretty good idea of what's coming after Koizumi shuts the door.

"Fufufu...Mikuru-chaann...come here, Mikuru-chaannn..."

"N-no! S-Suzumiya-san! I can dress myself!"

"Aw, but that's no fun. Here, let me help you."

Suggestive sound of clothing being removed.

"All right, off with your maid uniform and..._kyaa_! Whoa! Mikuru-chan, I'm shocked!"

Now I'm really interested. Something managed to shock Haruhi?

"You were wearing _this_ under that uniform? You naughty girl, I didn't know you had it in you!"

"Please stop! Stop! Aiiieeee!"

Damn you, Haruhi, stop putting such provocative images in my head. Besides, given Haruhi's subconscious reality-altering abilities, I'm sure Asahina-san has only been wearing that lingerie for the last few seconds, because Haruhi wanted to play with Asahina-san.

Minutes later, after Koizumi and I have long since changed into our T-shirts and shorts (oddly enough, they're perfect fits) ...

"It gets better, Mikuru-chan. I also bought a little surprise, just for us. Here!"

"Wh-what are you going to do with that?!"

"Give me your arm."

"Suzu——"

"Give it!"

More minutes later, after the sounds of more struggling and crying and Asahina-san's _"wahh, this looks so bad!"_ and Haruhi's _"relax, you look great!"_ ...

Haruhi throws open the door. It's about time!

"So, Kyon, how do we look?"

...revealing her, Asahina-san, and Nagato-san all wearing their newly acquired SOS-dan T-shirts and matching blue shorts. Haruhi's wearing that brilliant smile of hers that I've come to l—ah, I mean, appreciate.

And now I see the reason for Asahina-san's second round of crying, and Haruhi's "surprise". In her right hand (her left hand is busy holding Asahina-san's hand) Haruhi is still holding a tube of body paint, and she's painted both her forearms and Asahina-san's forearms with the word "SOS-dan".

Haruhi, where did you get such a harebrained idea?

I was about to ask her, when she impatiently turned to Asahina-san.

"And don't worry, Mikuru-chan, I got the good stuff, the kind of body paint that lasts for up to two weeks."

"Two weeks?!"

The thought of being a living advertisement for two weeks is making Asahina-san's face turn the same color as her maid uniform. I must admit, though, that Haruhi's drawing isn't too bad.

Meanwhile, Nagato-san is standing there wordlessly, wearing her new outfit, her virtual arms unpainted. Koizumi's smiling, what else is new?

Haruhi's face is positively ecstatic. If her smile were a power source, I'm sure she could easily power half the neighborhood by herself.

"Wow, Kyon, I'm flattered."

Haruhi perks up and turns back to me.

"But don't think that'll get you out of treating us next time you're late! In fact, I think I'll have you take me out for a bite to eat. Nothing real expensive, I'm in the mood for a ramen shop right now. There's a great one just down the street from my house."

"You're _making_ me take you out to dinner?"

Haruhi gestures at me with the tube of paint, still in her right hand.

"Just for that attitude, either you take me to dinner, or I'll share some of this body paint with you, and you won't _believe_ what I'll do with it!"

I let out an overly dramatic sigh, more for effect than anything else. Still, an evening with Haruhi...and I must admit, she _is_ quite attractive...

"All right, I'll take you out to dinner."


	2. Yuugata, Evening

**Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuugata**  
_The Evening of Suzumiya Haruhi_

_Disclaimer_: Many thanks to Tanigawa Nagaru-sensei for providing these wonderful characters! (And his writing style!)

* * *

A quiet November evening, Tuesday, 5:20 pm. I'm at Haruhi's front gate, and I still cannot believe I'm actually going through with this idea. Taking her out to dinner, I mean. Five days ago, she "forced" me to take her out to dinner, and I theatrically caved in. 

They say women are confusing, but I'm just plain confused. What, exactly, made me say yes? Maybe if I'd been hooked up to an MRI or an EEG at the time, some scientist could've figured it out for me. But that didn't happen, so I'm not going to waste my time worrying about it.

On the one hand, I consider myself quite fortunate to be the only guy in years who's gotten this close to Haruhi, and on the other hand...this is Haruhi. Need I say more?

But, just to provide some sense of continuity, let's jump back to the beginning.

_flashback to yesterday after school_

10 November, Monday, SOS-dan room. Haruhi hadn't arrived yet, but the rest of us had. If the rest of us have to treat the others as a penalty for being last, then why doesn't Haruhi fix up some snacks for us or something, since she's always arriving last at her own club?

By this point, we all knew that Haruhi was serious about our "dinner date" (as Koizumi called it) and that I was really going through with it. Since Haruhi hadn't arrived yet, I took the opportunity to ask the others what they thought of this whole situation.

"Asahina-san?"

"Yes, Kyon-kun?"

"Considering your...ah, 'experience'...with Haruhi, do you think I should say or do anything special, anything I wouldn't normally think of?"

I didn't even ask Asahina-san how this date was going to turn out, since that's in the future and she would just say _"classified information"_.

Asahina-san tipped her head to the side a little bit. Damn that's cute.

"Kyon-kun, are you trying to ask for a girl's perspective?"

"...well, when you put it that way, yes."

"Ohh, that's so romantic. Hmm, let's see..."

Asahina-san stared off into space for a moment, probably trying to figure out how much she could tell me without accidentally messing up the future. It's like when a friend knowing the situation gives you some advice that just "happens" to be correct.

"Normally, girls appreciate a tasteful bouquet of flowers, even on the first date, but somehow, Suzumiya-san doesn't seem like the type of girl who would care about flowers."

That's true, but Haruhi _is_ a girl, crazy or not, so I'm sure she would appreciate some sort of kind gesture.

"Flowers, huh?"

"Oh, and Kyon-kun?"

"Yes?"

"What great things would you attempt, if you knew you could not fail?"

Huh? It's unusual for Asahina-san (small) to suddenly talk like a fortune cookie, although I would expect no less from Asahina-san (big). When did—or rather, when will—Asahina-san begin talking so differently, and what will bring on such a change?

Anyway, this must have been Asahina-san's way of offering encouragement, letting me know that Haruhi and I would be fine.

"Begin...the rest is easy."

"I'll remember that. Thank you, Asahina-san."

"My pleasure, Kyon-kun."

Next up, Koizumi. I'd rather talk to Nagato-san, but given the sort of explanations that she seems to prefer, I decided to save her for last.

"As you know, my mission as a high-school-student-cum-esper is to ensure the stability of Suzumiya-san by acceding to her demands, and keeping her in a good mood."

"Right, but we've been over this already. What would you suggest for tomorrow night?"

"Just be yourself. Pretend she's a normal human being, and the rest...should follow naturally."

He punctuated this last part with his usual enigmatic smile. I didn't ask him how he would treat Haruhi if he were to date her.

Pretend she's a normal human being...don't I already do that?

_No_—a small voice in my head reminded me—_you don't, and you like that._

"Well, thanks for the advice."

"Anytime."

As I approached Nagato-san, I was simultaneously prepared for bursts of monosyllables or streaming vocabulary-enriched labyrinths.

"Nagato-san?"

She looked up at me (she was reading Kawabata Yasunari's "Snow Country") with her grey unblinking eyes.

"Can I ask you something?"

"...bookshelves."

She got up and began walking towards the bookshelves, not really aiming for any book in particular. It wasn't until she turned a corner and I lost sight of her that I got the message: follow her among the bookshelves, for privacy.

As expected, when I caught up to her, she was already seated cross-legged on a long table in the far corner of the Literature Club room. I knew where we were, of course, but it was far enough away that it felt like we were in a different room.

I got on the table and sat cross-legged as well.

"Nagato-san?"

"Yes?"

"You know I'm taking Haruhi out to dinner tomorrow night, right?"

"Yes."

"I know you're not human, but you've spent a lot of time observing Haruhi, so...do you have any advice for me?"

Nagato-san gazed into my eyes. I swear I saw myself reflected in one eye, and Haruhi reflected in the other eye. Just when I was about to flinch from the prolonged eye contact, she spoke.

"...stability."

"What do you mean?"

That one question opened the floodgates, and Nagato-san unleashed a torrent of words.

"You already know that the Data Integration Thought Entity is split into several factions. For the most part, these factions have united into two main 'parties'. One party desires minimal contact with Suzumiya-san, due to the high risk of another data explosion."

"But isn't that what you want, a data explosion?"

"Due to the volatility of data explosions, as well as the unpredictability of the data thus generated, triggering such a data explosion is ill-advised. However, the other party wishes to do exactly that, arguing that any data is better than no data."

"If the data is 'bad', let's say, does that mean you could get a virus or something, like our computers?"

"It is possible."

Hmm...well, I care and all, but how does this apply to tomorrow's dinner date?

"Because, for reasons only she can understand, Suzumiya-san has chosen you. Therefore, it is your duty to take care of her, trusting that she will take care of you in return. You already know that countless sentient beings, both living and nonliving, depend on Suzumiya-san in order to maintain our existence."

"So you're saying _'keep her happy and don't rock the boat'_, correct?"

"Correct."

"Thank you, Nagato-san."

She nodded.

"Wait...one more question."

"Yes?"

"Nagato-san, you mentioned that there are two parties in your world...which side are you on?"

"Of the two parties, there are five hundred fifty-five members in the first party, and five hundred fifty-five members in the second party."

"A deadlock...but what's _your_ position?"

"Independent."

Can a being like her really have independence, or want it?

"Any other independents?"

"No."

I hadn't expected that sort of answer. Nagato-san, the odd one out among her own kind. Does Nagato-san have any sort of preprogrammed emotions? And if so, does she ever get lonely?

"OK, I'll do my best to keep Haruhi happy."

"Thank you."

I do believe that's the first time I'd ever heard Nagato-san say _"thank you"_. Probably the first time she ever needed to say it.

She slid effortlessly off the table and walked away.

_flashback five hours before the present_

I was standing in a flower shop, having apparently decided that I would buy something for Haruhi after all. She is important to me, after all, even though there are times when I can barely stand her. This was not one of those times.

Unfortunately, I don't know the first thing about flowers, and the old woman behind the counter was staring at me in a way that was making me squirm inside.

While I was walking around the shop, a display caught my eye and Asahina-san's words came back to me.

"What great things would you attempt, if you knew you could not fail?"

_If I knew I could not fail..._

The display was...beckoning me, almost.

Is Haruhi worth the attempt? She's so unpredictable that I had no idea how she would react if she saw me standing at her front gate with this. She's so unpredictable that no matter what happened, I had nothing to lose, right?

_If I knew I could not fail..._

"All right, it's decided. She's worth the attempt."

_back to the present_

I'm at Haruhi's house. Her address and the directions to her house are right here on this piece of notebook paper in my pocket. She made me memorize the instructions and repeat them to her out loud, "in case the paper goes missing". She even threatened to write...stuff...on me with that body paint if I messed up.

Her house is in a relatively nice neighborhood, not too far from my own house. However, I'm not familiar with this neighborhood, and I'll admit that I had to retrace my steps once or twice before arriving here. At least Haruhi didn't set a time for me to arrive, simply contenting herself with "Tuesday evening". Which is now.

Haruhi's front gate is before me, the word _SUZUMIYA_ written on the nameplate in plain script. All I have to do is reach out with my free hand and push the intercom button.

No need to be nervous, we've known each other for several months now.

I push the button.

"Suzumiya residence."

The voice is pleasant, but doesn't sound like Haruhi's. Her mom, perhaps?

"My name's Kyon. Haruhi-san invited me here."

I can't believe that I gave that stupid nickname "Kyon" to a complete stranger. I also can't believe that I called Haruhi "Haruhi-san", but hey, politeness is important.

"Ah, yes, Kyon-san. One minute, please."

The intercom switches off, and soon the front door opens. Haruhi's standing there wearing blue jeans and a pale yellow T-shirt with the words _"HEY HEY YO"_ emblazoned on it in bright blue letters.

"Kyon, you're here."

I'm supposed to be here. And I can't help but grin.

Haruhi walks up to the front gate and opens it. When she sees what's in my hand, she takes a step back.

"I can't believe it..."

Haruhi's mouth falls open. Was this a bad idea, buying this for her?

Haruhi regains her usual composure and takes the single long-stemmed flower from my hand, turning it over and over in her hands.

"You know, Kyon, a rose is more traditional at times like this."

"Yeah, but——"

"But nothing. I have no idea how you knew...a morning glory is my favorite flower."

Well, that was an unexpected turn of events. I never would have expected Haruhi to react this way to a simple morning glory. And I certainly never would have expected Haruhi to have a favorite flower, but why am I surprised by that? It's just one more unpredictable thing about her.

"Kyon, I'll be right back. Feel free to wait here in the yard, I won't take long."

"OK."

Haruhi strides confidently back into her house and shuts the door. Soon, she returns to her yard, minus the flower. Hey, what did you do with it?

"Don't worry, Kyon, I simply put your gift in my room, that's all."

Haruhi flashes me her brilliant smile.

"Let's go! The ramen shop is right this way! Down the street, remember?"

We leave Haruhi's house, and once we're on the sidewalk, Haruhi notices something.

"Kyon, where's your ride? If you're picking me up, you don't expect me to walk all the way there, do you?"

"Well, you said it's just down the street, so I didn't bring my bike."

"Then I guess you're just going to have to pick me up."

"I _am_ picking you up."

She points right at me.

"No, Kyon, I mean literally. Carry me on your back, and that's an order from your Brigade Chief! Don't even think about disobeying me!"

Now she's standing in front of me, with her hands on her hips. Her left hand is drumming her fingers against her hip as she impatiently waits for my reaction. I wonder if this is Haruhi's way of flirting. It's worth a shot.

"Like hell I'm gonna do that. I am not going to—anyway, I've got an average build, and I don't think I could hold your weight."

I strain my back just giving my little sister piggyback rides.

"Hold my weight? What's that supposed to mean? Are you calling me heavy?"

"What?! Of course not, it's just——"

"Fine, we'll walk. But I'll remember this!"

Haruhi sticks her tongue out at me and leads the way toward the ramen shop. I quickly catch up with her.

While walking to the ramen shop, people occasionally stop and stare. I'm not sure what's drawing their attention—the fact that Haruhi, the known eccentric, appears to have a date, or the word "SOS-dan" still tattooed on her forearms with last week's body paint. She was right, that is long-lasting body paint. It's still as fresh as if she'd applied it five minutes ago.

"Kyon, what are you staring at?"

"Hm? Oh, nothing."

Later, at the ramen shop, we're at a semi-private booth enjoying tasty bowls of miso soup with ramen noodles and floating chunks of tofu.

"Haruhi, I just thought of something."

"What?"

She lays down her chopsticks. For somebody who gulps down Asahina-san's tea without a second thought, she's got excellent table manners.

"When I came to your house today, I got to the front gate before you. So you came last, and you should be paying for this."

She furrows her brow. I think I've finally outfoxed her!

Or not. She starts laughing.

"Kyon, I was already at my house, and I arrived well before you did. Therefore, you came last, and even if this wasn't a date, you'd still have to pay for it."

Another flash of her tongue. Damn, I really thought I had her that time.

Wait, did she just call this a date? Does that mean what I think it means?!

"What are you muttering about? Anyway, as long as we're talking, I want to share something with you."

"What's that?"

I'm trying to keep my voice neutral, since I have no idea what that "something" is going to be. Still, I'm curious.

Haruhi leans forward slightly.

"I don't think I told you, back at my house, why the morning glory is my favorite flower, did I?"

"No, I don't think you did."

"OK, what do you know about it?"

"Nothing. Most guys don't know that much about flowers."

I suppose not even that wannabe playboy Taniguchi knows any more about flowers than I do, but that's neither here nor there.

"To be honest, Kyon, I'm not an expert on flowers either. But I do know this. It's called the morning glory because it blooms every morning, and the blooms wither and die every evening."

"I didn't know that."

"Don't you see? It's like our proverb _'fall seven times, get up eight'_. No matter how many times the flower dies, it never loses hope, and it blooms again and again."

Haruhi's unusually quiet. I haven't heard her this quiet since her sixth-grade memory of the baseball stadium. In that suddenly soft voice, she continues talking.

"I like to think that people can do that too—that no matter how many times we fall, or fail, we can always pick ourselves up and try again. You wouldn't believe how many times I've gotten hurt, frustrated, and just plain pissed about the miserable luck I'm having in my search for the paranormal and the interesting."

If you only knew your luck in that department isn't as bad as you think it is.

"But I like to believe that the morning glory was put on this earth to remind people like me never to give up. That's why it's my favorite flower. I'll never give up."

Wow, that was...amazing.

After this speech, Haruhi stops talking and returns to her bowl, and I do the same. The rest of the meal is spent in companionable silence.

We finish our meal, I pay, and we leave. Outside the ramen shop (it's now twilight) Haruhi lays a calm and purposeful hand on my shoulder from behind.

She's never touched me so gently before. I kind of like not being dragged around, you know.

"Kyon."

I turn around.

"Haruhi?"

She smiles at me. Not her usual brilliant smile, but a warm and radiant smile, that I've only seen a few times in my life.

For some reason, I cherish such a smile.

And then, she speaks.

"Let's go to the park."


	3. Youjin, Caution

**Suzumiya Haruhi no Youjin**  
_The Caution of Suzumiya Haruhi_

_Disclaimer_: Many thanks to Tanigawa Nagaru-sensei for providing these wonderful characters! (And his writing style!)

_Notes_: Kitsune are Japanese fox-spirits. Wikipedia has a great article on them, if you're interested.

* * *

When did I stop believing in kitsune? I've already told you about how I never believed in Santa Claus but tentatively believed in our traditional spirits, demons, etc. Let's take a brief journey (an imaginary journey, not time travel) to my childhood. 

I vaguely remember that I was five years old. Our house was on the edge of the city, and I used to play in the forest by the house—always within shouting distance, of course.

One day—late spring, I think—I'd come home from Asou Kindergarten and was playing in the forest as usual, when I found a young Japanese red fox, letting out an eerie wail. When I went to investigate, I couldn't find anything wrong, but from the sound of her cries, she sounded like she was in great pain. I like to think I was able to calm her down somewhat, and so she became a sort of imaginary friend to me, although she was indeed a real fox. I named her Niki.

Niki often slept in the same burrow, so I visited her almost every day. I got to know her habits, when she didn't seem to mind my company, when she clearly wanted to be left alone. My mother was glad I had made friends with a wild animal, and she told me that it meant I would grow up and be able to make friends with almost anybody.

How right you were, Mom.

My mother also told me about "kitsune", our legendary fox-spirits, known for their intelligence and their ability to shapeshift into beautiful women. For a time I believed—looking back, it was more like role-play—that Niki was indeed a kitsune, and I remember having more than a few imaginary conversations with her. No, I don't remember what they were. And don't laugh—I was just a kid!

That summer, I learned the cause of Niki's distress—she was pregnant with five kits. She trained her kits well, and next spring, they matured into foxes in their own right, and ran away one by one to seek their own homes in the forest.

According to what I read, years later in middle school, a fox is ready to mate when she's a year old, and foxes generally live about 2-4 years in the wild. But of course I didn't know that when I was with Niki.

Three years after meeting Niki, I was eight years old, and getting ready to begin the third grade. By this time I had pretty much figured out that Niki wasn't going to morph into a woman anytime soon, and our "relationship" had settled into a more comfortable groove. I still believed she was a kitsune, but I discarded the shapeshifting part. Gradually, however, I began to notice little changes in Niki's behavior.

Though she was normally quite friendly after she got to know me, she eventually began to want to be alone more and more. When I tried to "converse" with her and ask what was wrong, she wouldn't answer.

One day several weeks later, after Niki had been playing less and less, I went to visit her, and her burrow was empty. When my father came home that evening, he mentioned finding a dead fox by the side of the road on his way home from work. It didn't take long to put two and two together.

For weeks afterwards, I was quite upset, and I clung to the old belief in Niki's kitsune status, childishly hoping that she would somehow take on a fox-form again, somehow. But as time went by, I was forced to admit that kitsune are not real, and that Niki was really dead, at the (assumed) age of four.

It was around that time, that I began to lose my childhood belief in the paranormal.

What does all this have to do with this evening's story? Even though I gave up my belief in the extraordinary, not everybody does. We tend to refer to such people (after they're safely dead, of course) as "visionaries" or, more euphemistically, as "dreamers". Haruhi's never-give-up speech stirred up this memory in me.

* * *

Tuesday twilight. The November sun's already fallen behind the buildings but hasn't quite set yet. The sky's gradually fading from blue to pink. A light breeze is ruffling Haruhi's short hair. 

Normally, I wouldn't bother to notice such details, but then again, I'm normally too busy trying to be a normal high school student. After meeting Haruhi, I don't know why I still cling to the belief that I _am_ a normal high school student. I probably ought to give up that belief as well.

We're walking to a local park—Kouyouen, I think the name is—because Haruhi suddenly decided that's where we're going. At least, it was sudden for me, but she may have been considering it while quietly eating her ramen. I don't mind this walk, and not just because it _is_ a walk (as opposed to being dragged around by my necktie).

Haruhi happily pats her full stomach, her painted forearms shining in the evening light.

"Thanks for dinner, Kyon. Now hurry up, will ya? I'm expecting you to walk me home like a gentleman—no funny stuff, hear me?—and I don't want you losing your way in the dark."

Is it the tryptophan, or whatever that chemical is? It must be the ramen that's making my usual sarcasm gradually wear down like rocks under a waterfall.

Haruhi breaks into a jog. Didn't your mother tell you not to do that so soon after eating?

"Race you to the park, Kyon! The loser has to pay for this evening's meal!"

Well, isn't that a fine trap. For one thing, I've _already_ paid for the meal. What's more, I don't know the way to the park she has in mind, so I'll have to follow her, and I'll come in last anyway.

"Stop talking to yourself and come follow me!"

I run after Haruhi, once again using the idea of _"this must be Haruhi's way of flirting"_.

At Kouyouen, Haruhi picks a spot—she must be familiar with this park—under a decent-sized peach tree, facing towards the setting sun. While walking round the tree and selecting a spot, she keeps glancing towards the setting sun. Somehow I don't think even _she_ finds it quite so interesting, so that's a mystery.

Haruhi keeps glancing between me and the tree. What does this woman want?!

"Kyon, give me a boost."

All I can do is stare at her. Boost? Where? And more importantly, why?

"Up the tree, that's where. And don't bother asking why, I'll tell you later."

"Haruhi, you can't just order me around like your personal footman, telling me _'give me a boost'_ and _'don't bother asking why'_."

Haruhi sighs through her nose, and relents a bit. Just a bit, which for her is a lot. Anyway—

"Fine, give me a boost and when I get up the tree, I'll pull you up too."

"Why?"

"Because it's tradition, all over the world, to watch the sunset after a date. And after making you take me out to dinner, I intend to take full advantage of such a rare opportunity. It's not every day that something like this happens to me, you know."

That's because, from what Taniguchi said, you spent your entire middle school career scaring off every guy that approached you.

Come to think of it, Haruhi hasn't really been acting like herself at all tonight. She's acting like...well, a normal high school girl. OK, somewhat normal.

Normal...

I know I supposedly have a big influence on Haruhi's subconscious, based on what Nagato-san and Koizumi keep telling me, but even this is a bit much for me. Is my so-called normal-ness having some kind of an effect on Haruhi?

And if it is...well, Koizumi told me to _"pretend she's a normal human being"_, didn't he?

Is that all this is? Is Haruhi really being...normal?

It can't be, and yet..._if I knew I could not fail..._

"All right, Haruhi, I'll give you a boost. _If_ you promise to pull me up when you get up there."

"Promise."

It's a reasonably large tree, big enough for two people to find room in, and Haruhi's never lied. Stretched the truth many times, sure, but never outright lied.

I kneel down, and Haruhi climbs on my shoulders. Damn, get up the tree already, I'm not Atlas!

"Kyon, stop whining. Just be glad I'm not a high-heels kind of girl."

Point taken.

She climbs up the large tree, and true to her word, she hooks her legs around a sturdy branch, sticks her hand down, and hauls me up into the trunk of the tree.

Could this day—or even the past few days—get any weirder? First, Haruhi makes me take her out to dinner, then she gives me her address and makes me memorize it, then she makes me take her to a nearby park, and now we're sitting in a tree.

Haruhi's such a twisted and complex woman. I wonder. Is this whole thing a ploy to get free food and cater to my ego? Or is there something more to this?

If she's a normal girl, then there's definitely more to this, waiting patiently underneath the surface. Women are like that. Even I know that.

Still, in this context, she's basically being a normal human being, so, I guess it wouldn't hurt to try being. well, "normal", right? Right?

"Haruhi?"

She turns to me. "What is it, Kyon?"

How do I say this?

"This whole evening...I'm not complaining or anything, but I get the feeling there's something more to this. Your plans are _never_ this simple."

Her eyes are wide and sparkling. Whoever says _"When Irish eyes are sparkling, they're always up to something"_ has obviously never met Haruhi.

Suddenly, Haruhi (sitting on my right) shifts her seat among the branches, turning to face me at a ninety-degree angle, or rather, as close to a ninety-degree angle as the branches of this peach tree will allow.

Her brilliant smile is back, and with it, my gut instinct telling me that I may not like the answer to this question. But hey, my luck has gotten me—gotten _us_, I should say—this far, hasn't it?

"Yes, Kyon, I have my own reasons."


	4. Kokuhaku, Confession

**Suzumiya Haruhi no Kokuhaku**  
_The Confession of Suzumiya Haruhi_

_Disclaimer_: Many thanks to Tanigawa Nagaru-sensei for providing these wonderful characters! (And his writing style!)

* * *

My name is Kyon, and I'm a masochist. Wait, this isn't Masochists Anonymous? Fine, I'll get back to the story. 

Haruhi's admission that she has her own reasons for this date, or for anything she does...well, that's nothing new. The serious tone in which she openly admitted it, however, is new.

Please don't draw this out, my butt's starting to itch from sitting in the branches of this peach tree.

"Well, Kyon, your butt can just go to sleep, it doesn't need to be awake to listen to me anyway."

"..." Haruhi's dirty-old-man grin (the one she uses when she's getting ready to sexually harass Asahina-san for the hundredth time) temporarily stuns the words right out of me.

"So you basically asked me why I had you take me out to dinner in the first place."

Haruhi draws a breath. Can't you just get to the point?

"Shut up, Kyon, I'm trying to say this right. Girls care about these things. Anyway, I'll admit that at first, it was an impulse. I'm rather impulsive, I know, and it seemed like a good idea at the time."

"But that night, and the next night, I got to thinking that there must've been some deeper reason that I wasn't really aware of, to make me say that without really thinking. Like a subconscious desire or something. Say, Kyon, do you believe in the subconscious?"

I don't want to answer that, because then we'll go off on a tangent. Besides, after hanging out with you all this time, I'll believe pretty much _anything_.

"Fine, be that way, Kyon. I'll remember that. That night was Thursday, the day I suddenly got the idea for the date. This afternoon, five days later, I was in my room getting ready and—"

"You actually got ready?"

Haruhi mock-punches me in the shoulder.

"Shut up, a date's important! Like I said, it's not every day that something like this happens to me. Besides, we're outside of the SOS-dan right now, and we Brigade Members _are_ allowed to have personal relationships. How boring it would be if we didn't! It's my responsibility as Brigade Chief to ensure the well-being of my members, you know."

Somehow, I knew this was ultimately connected to the SOS-dan, Haruhi's one true passion in life. But maybe I'm reading too much into this.

"—I was getting ready and it hit me that I really don't know that much about you, Kyon. See, I was never the girl-next-door type, the type who's known some guy all her life."

I'd be surprised if you were.

"You know, I don't like not knowing. But that's about to change. Don't worry, Kyon—"—she notices the strange look I give her—"—this isn't about research, or a fact-finding mission. This is about you and me, connecting, as people, as friends."

This is a big change from the girl who used to refer to her classmates as if they were objects. Still, it would be in the world's best interest to make friends with the girl with the world-shaking reality-altering ability. Wait...that couldn't have been the only reason I agreed to do this. There must have been something in my subconscious too...

Haruhi, sitting on her branch, idly kicks her legs in the air.

"So, Kyon, what I'm trying to say is that I'd like to get to know you. Because you're interesting, in your own way."

"Really..."

"Yes, really. I swear, you question everything I say. Well, here's a question for you. Where are you from?"

Huh? That question certainly threw me off balance. And speaking of balance, I'm supposed to be keeping Haruhi on an even keel, according to Nagato-san, right? _"Keep her happy and don't rock the boat"_ is how I summed it up.

What if I give the wrong answer, or one that Haruhi doesn't like? More to the point, where do I even begin?!

"Begin...the rest is easy." Asahina-san's other bit of advice comes back.

I sigh.

"Well, my family is originally from Saitama, but I've lived in this city for about four years." Four years...I'd only been living in this city for a few months when...Tanabata...happened.

Tanabata—the night 11-year-old Kyon was mildly exploring his new home, not knowing that 15-year-old Kyon was helping an eccentric 12-year-old girl paint unusual symbols that would change the world forever.

Wait a second...that means when Kyon (big) was involved in the Tanabata incident, Kyon (small) had only been living here a short time.

Does that mean Haruhi subconsciously drew me to her, like she drew the other SOS-dan members?

"What are you going on about, _'subconsciously drawing you to me'_ and all that? Are you trying to talk about fate, or karmic agreement?"

...sort of. Damn, I need to bring up Tanabata without making her suspicious. But how?

"Anyway, Kyon, why'd you move here?"

"It's a long story. See, about four years ago—I was in the sixth grade at the time—Dad went out with some of his friends to a baseball game in Tokyo. After the game, he was driving home when a car slid across the freeway into his lane, and it just barely missed him. After that, he decided that he didn't want to commute between Tokyo and Saitama anymore, so he accepted a job transfer, and we moved here."

Funny how things work out.

"Wait just a minute. Are you trying to say that something caused that near-accident so that your dad would take a job transfer here, thus allowing you and me to finally meet?"

Well, when you put it that way...no! I can't let myself get sidetracked. I have to bring up Tanabata, somehow...I got it!

"So after moving here—"

"—Don't you dare change the subject!—"

"—I began exploring this new city, and I was so busy exploring, I even managed to miss Tanabata."

A crappy excuse, but the effect is instantaneous.

"You _missed_ Tanabata?! Kyon, you idiot, don't you have any pride in this country's cultural heritage?"

Without waiting for me to defend myself, Haruhi presses on.

"Anyway, I'm glad I was able to make up for it, providing a proper Tanabata celebration for the SOS-dan. I'm already getting ideas for next year's Tanabata."

Do any of those ideas involve Asahina-san? Dare I ask?

"Mikuru-chan? Of course, how did you guess? Speaking of Tanabata, I have to say that the best Tanabata I ever had, other than our tenth-grade one, was the one from seventh grade."

Somehow, I figured that, even without you being aware of it. But go on. Maybe this will finally explain at least part of what happened three years ago. Plus, it'll help me find out where I fit in your world, which would certainly help develop this odd relationship that you and I have.

"You know as well as I do, of course, that Tanabata falls on the seventh day of the seventh month. But that Tanabata was especially important to me, because it was on the seventh day of the seventh month, in the seventh grade. All those sevens. That's pretty cool, don't you think?"

Um...sure, if you're into sevens, I guess. Aren't there people who believe 11:11 to be the most important time of day, who worship 11 November, etc.?

"I firmly believe that seven is a magical number. Don't you agree, Kyon?"

"Where'd you get that idea?"

"Well, if you think about it, the ancient Chinese were really quite interested in the numbers five and seven. The seven directions, for example—east, west, south, north, center, internal, external."

I thought there were only _five_ cardinal directions. But it's your world, so anything's possible.

"And the seven elements—the five Chinese elements plus life and death. There's also the seven sensory bases—the five basic senses plus mind and spirit."

Personally, I think you're showing me your _own_ view of the world, not necessarily the Chinese view. But again, it's your world.

"That, and all the sevens in the seventh-grade Tanabata, are why the number seven is so important to me. Say, we need to have seven members in the SOS-dan. That'd draw interesting events for sure!"

You, me, Asahina-san, Nagato-san, Koizumi, Tsuruya-san—that's only six members. But if we count Asahina-san (big) and Asahina-san (small) as separate people, then...uh-oh.

No, back up a second. Don't tell me..._that's_ why you drew me to you on that specific night? Based on something little more than...than...some stupid _number game_? That's so anticlimactic. How _boring_!

"Number game? Kyon, what the hell are you going on about? In my world, the number seven matters, okay? If I could, I'd make a world where the number seven is very important."

If you could, you'd make a world where you and I are the only two people in it.

"Are you fantasizing about me, Kyon?" She grins. "I might have to think up a punishment for that. Unless, of course, that's what you _want_ me to do, in which case I'd have to punish you by _not_ punishing you, which would sort of be a punishment in itself. Hmm, a paradox."

I really wish you wouldn't think about that. If you only knew what happens when you think too much...

"Anyway, I've also come to an important realization about the number seven."

(Author's note: Sorry to interrupt, but the Japanese word for "seven" is "shichi".)

Having brought up this realization of hers, Haruhi keeps talking.

"Our word 'shichi' is written with the character for 'seven', of course, but it could also be written phonetically with the characters for 'death knowledge'. The number seven is the key to understanding life and death, at least in my world. I don't know exactly how, but I'm convinced that it is. Are you following me?"

"Haruhi, I swear, you are obsessed with the number seven. What are you going to do on Tanabata when you're seventy-seven years old?"

Haruhi turns away without answering.

I know this is yet another of Haruhi's eccentricities, but it still makes me ask myself whether I really _want_ a relationship with such an eccentric girl. Do I? Is she still worth the effort?

_Yes_—a small voice in my head says—_but it'll take a lot of work, from both of you, to make this relationship work. If you truly hated Haruhi and her ways, you would have walked away long ago, and not even Asahina-san's heavenly tea could have lured you back._

Great, now my head and my heart are doing battle.

The sun slips below the horizon, and now it's officially dusk. The sky is blue-grey like the uniform of the Yokohama BayStars. (Although I am, of course, a Seibu Lions fan.)

There may be another motivation for developing a stronger relationship with Suzumiya Haruhi, other than my apparent subconscious desire. Haruhi doesn't seem to notice, but the colors all around us seem duller than usual. Don't get me wrong, there's still plenty of color to be found, it just seems more muted, more greyish. Like the world is turning into one giant watercolor painting, the predominant color being blue-grey.

We're still sitting in the peach tree, and the leaves have quickly faded from their usual green to a sea-green color in a matter of seconds. And the peaches have faded from a bright yellow-orange to a rust color.

Haruhi still doesn't seem to notice anything, staring off into the branches, lost in thought. I look around to see if any passers-by notice the changing colors, but there doesn't seem to be anybody else around besides the two of us.

"Haruhi."

She sits motionless.

"Haruhi."

No response.

"Haruhi, this isn't funny. I really don't deserve this silent treatment."

But what if that's not it?

"_Haruhi!_"

I reach out and shake her shoulder, careful not to knock her out of the tree. Haruhi snaps out of her trance and turns to me.

"What do you want, Kyon? I'm busy thinking about my _'stupid number game'_, okay? Leave me alone right now."

I decide to ignore the ice in her tone.

"Don't you notice anything unusual?"

Wasn't there a slight breeze just a few moments ago? I wonder if Haruhi notices the sudden absence of the wind. The breeze isn't ruffling her short hair anymore, and for some reason, that really bothers me right now.

"You're being a jerk, that's what I notice. You can't go around insulting people's deepest beliefs, you know."

Haruhi's voice is level, but I've never seen such a pained look on her face before. She's genuinely hurt, and...I've caused it.

"I know you and I play rough all the time, but this time...you've crossed the line, Kyon. Just because I like to play rough, doesn't mean I don't have feelings. Please, just...leave me alone."

Haruhi drags a hand through her hair, a hand as flat and joyless as her voice. This could be serious. No, wait, this _is_ serious.

Haruhi is upset...and am I just seeing things, or is the world really fading to grey? I swear, the color's slowly vanishing before my eyes.

What's even more odd is that Haruhi and I seem to be the only beings around whose colors aren't fading. Even now, in the dusk, I can plainly see Haruhi's pale yellow T-shirt with its bright blue catchphrase _"HEY HEY YO"_.

And her painted forearms—which, by the way, were painted to combine our usual weekend citywide search with shameless SOS-dan promotion—are as bright as ever, her forearms painted white like feudal-era forearm guards, and the word _"SOS-dan"_ painted in bright red on each forearm.

Meanwhile, Haruhi continues to act like the world isn't changing, although by this point it's obvious, even to me, that it _is_ changing.

She's upset...fading to grey...oh shit. I'm triggering a Sealed Reality!

Dammit, I'm supposed to be keeping her stable! Well, I got us into this mess, so it's up to me to get us out.


	5. Kesshin, Decision

**Suzumiya Haruhi no Kesshin  
**_The Decision of Suzumiya Haruhi_

_Disclaimer_: Many thanks to Tanigawa Nagaru-sensei for providing these wonderful characters! (And his writing style!)

* * *

Oh, my world is so dark and grey... 

That'd be a pretty typical bit of teenage angst, except for the fact that, actually, the world is _literally_ grey and cheerless.

Leave it to me to unthinkingly (unconsciously?) trigger a world-shaking event on the first date. It'll be the last date, too, if I don't think of something.

Haruhi isn't bored, she's upset, and that's far worse.

Right now, I just need to think of a way to stop this madness and restore Haruhi's good mood. The others keep reminding me that I hold a special influence on Haruhi's subconscious, and if I need proof, all I have to do is think of that little "incident"—or rather, those fifteen-thousand-odd little "incidents"—back in August.

That was only three months ago, so don't think I've forgotten. Besides, I couldn't forget anything connected to that woman if I wanted to. I've ended up storing our shared memories as easily as my own memories.

Speaking of connection, didn't Haruhi announce last Thursday, when this whole fiasco started, that _"all things are interconnected"_? That would explain why all these seemingly random occurrences keep circling back to Haruhi's apparent divinity, like bees that continue to pollinate the same flower.

I have a growing suspicion, though I can't prove it yet, that Haruhi is so intertwined with this time-stream that she's found a way to continually interrupt the time-stream (in the future) and trigger her own existence (in the past). She's such an anomaly that I really wouldn't doubt something like that. Continuously triggering her own existence...come to think of it, that's kind of like her "morning glory" speech from this afternoon. Morning glories, a cycle of death and rebirth.

If Haruhi keeps "regenerating" like this, over and over, then that means this can't be the end...can it? It can't be, because she doesn't want it to be. And this little realization gives me a boost of courage to talk to her.

Here goes.

"Haruhi."

As before, I reach out and lay a hand on her shoulder, this time a (hopefully) calming and steadying hand. She turns to me.

"What?" She snaps at me. "I told you to leave me alone."

"I can't tell you what, if I have to leave you alone."

That has got to be the dumbest thing I've ever said.

"Don't play that sort of mind-games with me, Kyon. You know, I'm seriously starting to reconsider our friendship. I'm not asking for a yes-man like Koizumi-kun, but if you're going to insult my deepest beliefs..."

Haruhi lets the sentence hang. Our shared mood (_shared_ mood?) is sinking like a heavier-than-air gas.

"I'm an impulsive girl, but even I don't take this sort of thing lightly. I do have emotions, and feelings, even if I don't always show them."

This isn't like you, Haruhi. Aren't you being a bit irrational? And speaking of irrational, have you noticed our surroundings?

As if hearing that last thought, Haruhi looks around and takes in the view for the first time.

"What happened?" Her voice is concerned, its hard edge temporarily forgotten. I'm no expert on body language, but still, this could be a good sign. Her mood is slightly less dark than it was a few seconds ago...right?

"Haruhi..."

Where do I begin? How can I, in essence, tell her _"the world really does revolve around you"_? She'd never believe such a thing. But it's worth a try.

"You have some sort of..._'ability'_, let's call it. I don't know if you're psychic, or paranormal, or something, but the world alters itself to suit your needs. Like when we were making the movie, for example. You needed white birds, and sakura in autumn, and there they were. Also—"

"Are you trying to tell me I did all that? And all this, too?"

"More or less, yes."

"I don't believe you. If I were psychic, don't you think I would've noticed by now?"

She has a point there.

"Anyway, Kyon, that's really beside the point. This weird grey world, that we're seeing right now, must be a trick of the light or something. It is past sunset, after all. It's too bad there isn't anybody walking by that we could ask."

Of course not. In this Sealed Reality, it's just you and me. But I keep those thoughts to myself. The important thing right now is to repair the damage and undo the Sealed Reality.

"I'm..." Why is this so difficult? "I'm sorry."

She might as well have taken that two-week body-paint and written the word _"disbelief"_ on her forehead. But at least her voice is much calmer.

"Why, Kyon? My world is fundamentally different from yours, don't forget that. If I choose to believe that the number seven is indeed important, then so be it. Don't I have a right to my own thoughts?"

"Well, yeah, but when I said you were obsessed with the number seven, I meant—"

"That's why I'm insulted. _'Obsessed'_? I don't like that word, _'obsessed'_. You're making me sound like a rambling psychotic. I am definitely _'devoted'_ and _'passionate'_ about my personal beliefs, but _'obsessed'_? No. Never."

I won't make the same mistake twice. No commentary, just listening.

"What's the difference?"

"The difference between what and what? I really wish you'd make yourself clear sometimes, Kyon."

"Between _'passionate'_ and _'obsessed'_."

Haruhi sighs through her nose and considers that for a minute.

"Basically, the way I see it, _'passion'_ is a strong liking for something. A guiding post, a north-star, if you will. For example, the SOS-dan is my passion. You have no idea what lengths I'll go to for the SOS-dan, and especially for the people in it."

"But _'obsession'_ is different. It's like a passion, but way stronger. Obsessions destroy people, because they end up forgetting about things like eating, sleeping, and enjoying life. I _do_ have a life outside the SOS-dan, you know."

"If you had never given me the idea to form the SOS-dan in the first place, I would still be out there searching for the paranormal. I won't lie to you, the search for the extraordinary is my overriding passion. But I would never let that get in the way of simply living life and having fun."

Haruhi lets out a big sigh as her latest speech winds down. Her tone is still somewhat upset, but far more composed compared to a few minutes ago.

"That's why I'm not obsessed, Kyon, and I'm insulted that you would think that way about me. You and I are complete opposites, sure, but I'd never call you _'obsessed'_ if you were to share your thoughts with me. Which you really need to do sometime, by the way. You're holding something in, I can tell. _'Get it off your chest'_ and what-not. It's good for you."

I release Haruhi's shoulder and lean back in my branch-seat. Complete opposites, huh? Like yin and yang, I suppose. I guess I'd be the passive relenting yin, and Haruhi would be the active relentless yang.

In our Classical Literature class, we recently learned that the Chinese characters for yin and yang originally referred to the shady and sunny sides of a hill, respectively.

But every yin has a little yang, and vice versa. A tree on the yin side of the hill gets a little sunshine, and a tree on the yang side casts a little shadow.

To bring this all together, and to inject some semblance of cohesiveness, Haruhi's got a bit of yin, and I've got a bit of yang. Think about it. Haruhi's the one bringing darkness (temporary, but still) to our world, and I'm the one trying to bring in a bit of light. Ironic, isn't it?

At that moment, Nagato-san's one word pops up in my mind for whatever reason: _"...stability."_

I smack my forehead.

"Why'd you do that?"

The first words Haruhi's spoken in several minutes, and you can't imagine how grateful I am.

"Because I just realized something."

"What?"

"Hold on, I'm still thinking about it."

"Kyon, if it's a flash of insight, you don't need to think about it, because you already know it."

I put aside that comment for a moment.

Stability. That's the key.

And then it hits me. Of course Nagato-san, our near-omniscient data goddess, would have found a way to give me a clue, in her own quiet way.

But yin and yang are _never_ stable. Yin wants to be stable and yang wants to be unstable. They're in a state of constant—no, not battle, what's the word I'm looking for—flow. Constant flow.

Interconnectedness. Everything a metaphor for everything else. Morning glories. Death and rebirth. Yin and yang. Circling round and round. They're all touching on the same thing: nothing is permanent, everything is in a state of constant change.

And when you get right down to it, that's pretty damn interesting.

I explain all this to Haruhi, who's listening with rapt attention for once. There's a certain fire in her eyes—always has been, I notice. Sometimes it's a bright torch's fire, sometimes it's a raging forest fire, sometimes it's a smoldering cinder.

If she's fire, then I'm water. Cooling rain, soothing baths, and yes, floods and typhoons. Both fire and water are in a state of perpetual flow, and when they come together, they can make beautiful steam. But one thing's for sure: I would never be the one to put out that fire.

"Kyon?"

"Yeah?"

"You and I...about our relationship, or whatever it is we have..."

"What about it?"

"Well, considering what you just said about change, and flow, and all that...relationships change, don't they? And if you and I are always changing, then we might be compatible one minute and not the next." She pauses. "What I'm saying is that we shouldn't tie ourselves down just yet. I think it would work—a relationship, I mean—but we really ought to take things slow. Are you okay with that, Kyon?"

Her earnest expression is back, in full force. There's only one word right now that would make her happy, and I'm determined to say it.

"Yes."

I glance out behind Haruhi at the sky, now a cobalt blue, like a normal dusk. Everything's going to be okay.


	6. Afterword

**Suzumiya Haruhi no Kioku – Atogaki  
**_The Memory of Suzumiya Haruhi – Afterword_

Konbanwa, _Flower of Paper_ here. If this is your first time reading one of my stories, it's nice to meet you.

This story started out as a fun little romp of a one-shot, but since it wouldn't be fair to hint at a date without actually describing it, I brainstormed for a while and came up with all sorts of ideas. And here we are.

I wasn't expecting this story to gradually drift from Tanigawa-sensei's style into magical realism...call it part of the organic process of writing. Was this drift due to Haruhi's subconscious or mine? (laughs) I'm quite fond of magical realism, especially Gabriel García Márquez and Isabel Allende. (Wikipedia has a great article on magical realism if you're interested.)

As for the views expressed in this story...I won't lie to you, some are mine and some are not. For example, the opinions on interconnectedness (Chapter 1) and yin-yang (Chapter 5) are mine. The "morning glory speech" (Chapter 2) is Haruhi's personal opinion, and the fascination with the number seven (Chapter 4) is hers too. Nothing like Kyon's kitsune story (Chapter 3) actually happened to me—that was pure imagination, as was the story of Kyon's father.

I'd like to leave a short note on the number seven. Though I originally wrote Haruhi's opinions on the number seven off the top of my head, your tremendous response to that chapter prompted me to do a bit of research on the so-called mystical properties of the number seven, which led to my listening to _"Fresh Aire 7: Mystic 7"_ by Mannheim Steamroller, which I randomly found in the library. It turns out that there are many more connections with the number seven than I had originally considered. Whether such "connections" are true or coincidental, I don't know. You don't necessarily have to believe them, but it was an interesting bit of research nonetheless.

The cyclic nature I mentioned in Chapter 5, especially in reference to Haruhi's self-regeneration, stemmed from the cyclic nature of magical realism. Also, there is Haruhi's pseudo-article in Volume 8 (Editor-in-Chief : Straight Ahead!). I won't say what, in order to avoid a spoiler, but it does provide a sort of canon basis for the idea.

One of my other main goals for this story, was to develop Haruhi, not only as a character, but as a person. Hopefully I succeeded in this regard.

To all those who read this story and took the time to voice an opinion, thank you very much. I would also like to take the opportunity to thank Esbee and Audley for their advice during the creation and growth of this story. Thank you for your constructive criticism, and I hope this story ended up being as good as you had hoped.

To wrap up this story, I'd like to leave you with a quote to consider.

"Invisible and subtle is the mind." — Siddhartha Gautama, the Buddha

**O-yomi itadaki, arigatou gozaimashita!**  
_ Thank you very much for reading!_

— _Flower of Paper_


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